I am so frustrated with Caleb. It is all I can do not to just shake him until all the stupidity dribbles out of his ears. He has got to be one of the most intellectually gifted young men I have known in a long time but he is wasting his life away. Perhaps that is being a little melodramatic but he only has three more years until he is on his own. His grades are dismal. Worse than mine ever were. Whenever I talk to him about them (which is just about daily), he tells me that he just doesn't care. This morning, on the way to seminary, I was asking him about his homework for the day. He started getting surly and irritated. Finally he told me that he doesn't really want to go to college, that his plan is to go staight into the military. While I would be proud to have a child in the military (the Air Force is his branch of choice), he doesn't seem to realize that his choices will be severely curtailed without a college education. He has these dreams of doing great, wonderful things but isn't willing to put the work in. I am really hoping that this is just immaturity rearing its ugly head and that he will realize quickly that he is headed for trouble.
Awhile ago, a woman cutting my hair asked me if there was a history of premature grayness in my family. I told her no and asked why, afraid of the answer. She told me, as kindly as she could, that I had more gray than most men my age. What I didn't tell her was that I have earned every one of those gray hairs. Not to make light of Adrianne's situation but there are days that I would give my left thumb for the opportunity to go back to wondering when the next time I would get sit through church would be. Instead, I worry about the choices my children are making, knowing full well that there is not much I can do to shelter them from the consequences of those choices. Although I am very grateful for my children, there are days that I question my mental status.
It all started with Michelle Lewis from Ohio, and Jason Clark from California. We met on a bus in Chicago in January of 1992. This is a blog that documents our crazy life.
6 comments:
Okay Jason, I was already pretty sure that I wanted to find a way to stop my kids from getting older, but now I am totally sure! My kids are at a great age right now...one where they are fun, fairly obedient and most importantly they think that whatever I say is the absolute best and right thing!
Abby starts kindergarten in a few months and it makes me sad to think that my influence (or do I really mean control?) over her will lessen as she gets older. I'm not excited about the things that she will be exposed to as she is around people with differing value systems, but I know I can't keep her home forever!
Good luck!
Jeni, don't you know that whatever you say is the absolute best and right thing? You've trained me that way... -Jester
Jason just call me and I'll talk to him. I hopefully can/will have an influence on him. I'll make sure that he remembers the science building at BYU. He loved it. He just needs to come and spend a little time out here. I want him to too. Maybe I'll talk to him today.
Katy-did :)
Jason,
You must get that book I have mentioned and read it quickly! It is by Sax, and is named Boys Adrift.
Dad Clark
Jason, the difference between my situation at church and your previous situation at church is that I sit by myself. My spouse isn't sitting with me. He hasn't sat by me the entire time I've had children. He hasn't sat by me since I was pregnant with Will. So, going to church is a real challenge for me. When my children are your children's ages I will worry about them in different ways. I'm sure I will worry that they won't want to come to church. I'm sorry Caleb is such a challenge for you. Isaac is my difficult one.
Oh, and you can tell Caleb that he will never make as much money in the Air Force as someone that has gone to college. Mike makes more as a 1st Lt. than someone that's been in as an enlisted person for 15 years. In just a few years he will make more than an elisted person that's been in for 30 years. So, a degree is an important thing in the Air Force. Besides, if he wants to be a pilot, he has to have a degree. But, Mike made a good point. He said that it is better to go into the Air Force and do something he likes than to get a degree in something he will never use.
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